Humorous Quiz: Are You an Overeater?

| By Rod Thorell |

While there seems to be a strong trend toward healthier eating, at the same time restaurants are adding more bacon to pretty much everything.

Don’t get me wrong, bacon on a donut is wonderful, but did we really need that as a thing?

Bacon aside, sometimes it isn’t what you eat, but how much you eat that gets you in trouble. So I have devised this simple quiz to see if you might be an overeater.

Add up your scores and share your shame in the comments!

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Overeaters Quiz

  • Eaten a fritter or coffee roll intended for more than one person. +1
  • Eaten all the donut holes before they made it home to the kids. +3
  • Eaten an entire box of Kraft macaroni and cheese alone. +1
  • Eaten an entire box of Kraft macaroni and cheese from the pan with a serving spoon, while standing over the stove. +3
  • Eaten an entire sleeve of Girl Scout cookies in one sitting. +1
  • Eaten an entire box of Girl Scout cookies in one sitting. +3
  • Signed up to get a text message from Brusters that they just made your favorite flavor. +1
  • Get phone call from Donut King that they just made your favorite flavor. +3
  • Finished something because you didn’t want to leave that little bit as a leftover. +1
  • Finished another adult’s meal at a restaurant. +3
  • Stopped at a drive thru on the way home from a meal. +5
  • Stopped eating at an all you can eat buffet, not because you were full, but because the person you were with was bored. +1
  • Stopped eating at an all you can eat buffet, not because you were full, but because the owner shut you off. +3
  • Dug frantically through the change bucket because you heard the ice cream man. +1
  • Asked the ice cream man if he takes credit cards. +3
  • Take a sliver of each kind of pie at Thanksgiving because you want to try them all. +1
  • Take a full-size piece of each kind of pie at Thanksgiving because YOLO. +3
  • Had to say “Wait, my wife hasn’t ordered yet!” at a fast food cashier. +1

Scoring

0-5:  No, you are not an overeater, you are bored. Read the rest of Clermontmagazine.com and then go to bed.

6-20: You may have a problem overeating on occasions. Like Christmas, Birthdays, Diwali, Feast of Fools and weekdays that end in ‘Y’.

21-30: You overeat more often than not. You might notice the nervous glances when you show up for family cookouts. You are on a first name basis with the lady that cooks sample recipes at Publix.

31-35: Yes, clearly you are an overeater. Golden Corral probably has your picture beside the hostess stand as a warning.

35-38: You probably took this quiz with one hand while you ate a bowl of cereal. Your computer keyboard is fouled by muffin crumbs and fried chicken grease.


20150724_115136Grumpydad (Rod Thorell) and the love of his life, Donna, relocated to Clermont in 2015, where he works from home helping create software. You can follow his misadventures on Instagram, @grumpydad_goes_to.

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